for halloween im going as a disappointment to my family
at least you dont need to buy a costume
nigga if a girl wants to talk to you every minute of the day, wants to talk on the phone to hear your voice, wants you to send her pictures because she likes seeing your face, wants to introduce you to her friends and family, willing to travel distance for you, wants to smother you with affection, waits for you no matter how long, sticks by your side no matter how much wrong you’ve done
like dude she fucking loves you man dont fucking waste a good girl like that
Haha just like when I had my first beer.
iced beverage weather #holla #selfie #starbucks #orangevalencia #tumblr
In honor of the two conflicting holidays
ads for pads these days are all about how thin and discreet pads are and how no one will ever be tell you’re wearing them wELL HOW ABOUT YOU MAKE THE PACKAGING QUIETER BECAUSE THERE’S NO FUCKING POINT IN HAVING A THIN DISCREET PAD WHEN EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU RIPPING ONE OPEN IN THE SCHOOL BATHROOM
Use the men’s room they won’t expect it
'Who the fuck is eating chips in here?'
Jams to anime openings
This is so true lol
“dog food lid” backwards is “dildo of God.”